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I don’t know if it’s the idealization of living spiritually from the media or the “love and light” culture, but there’s this perception that living a spiritual life, or being spiritually aware suddenly makes your life easier, better, and even free from burdens, difficulty or struggle. This could not be further from the truth. While being tuned-in and following the guidance of Source does make your life much more fulfilling and easier at times, it not only takes effort, but sometimes pure willpower as you shed the old to make room for the new.
Living spiritually isn’t a single act or using metaphysical supplies you binged on Amazon because some book told you to, it’s a lifestyle that requires daily mindfulness of who you are, your place in the cosmos, our connectedness, and the knowledge that you will be thrown curveballs along the way. These curveballs may be tests to see whether you are paying attention and really willing to do the work, the shedding of things from your life that no longer suit the version of who you’re becoming, or from not so savory forces that want to prevent or discourage you from joining the “army of light” as W.E. Butler refers to it. Whatever the source of the curveball, they tend to present by way of The Tower, or at least in artistic representation.
Tarot Readers and querents alike tend to dislike The Tower tarot card because of it’s rather shocking and distressing imagery, but I believe that if we change our perception of the card, it can be rather inviting. On the Rider-Waite-Smith Tower card, Key 16, the lightning flash represents the Lightning Flash of Divine inspiration, illumination, and the Descent of Manifestation. This is where we are suddenly struck with an idea, something is no longer hidden in the dark, and false foundations or blockages (even if we don’t recognize them to be) are removed. Anyone who has been around the block or two knows that when you are being pushed to do something by Spirit and you’re hesitant or resistant, Spirit tends to light a fire under your hind-end or give you a swift kick by way of having no option other than to take action in the direction you were once being peacefully nudged towards. This is The Tower.
While it can be rather stressful, upsetting and unnerving at the time that it is happening, The Tower, these curveballs, serve their purpose. So however they come at you, know that it’s the difficult things in life that give you true occult knowledge and spiritual growth. These obstacles serve as passages for immeasurable growth if you can just find something to lock your eyes onto in order to steady your balance, redefine your center, and then proceed mindfully despite the destruction.
It’s important that you know that if you decide to take this journey, to dedicate yourself to growth and the destruction of illusions and false identities in the name of enlightenment, you’re going to have some Tower moments; and the more you grow, the more false Towers will be destroyed.
I feel that it is important that those of us assisting others in their journey be open and honest about what working in the light can bring about, The Tower. It sounds counterintuitive to say to “work in the light” and have a disdain for the “love and light” culture, but they are two very different things. “Love and light” culture is this spiritual movement built on this falsehood that everything is just going to be peachy if you just throw love and Divine light at something while completely ignoring what needs to be addressed or worked on. This is extremely toxic, dangerous, and will most emphatically lead to massive Towers not only falling, but probably blowing up at a most inconvenient time when you’re least prepared. With that being said, I’ve had more than my fair share of Towers and I imagine I will have more to come, though hopefully not quite as shocking as some that have come to pass.
These past two weeks have brought about another one of these curveballs, a serious situation yet opportunity for growth in my life. I’ve had to rely on my inner strength and constant resolve to stay centered, to move with leadership and compassion, and to know that while I may not feel prepared, I have all of the tools I need. On Friday, May 21st I received a phone call at 9:30 at night that my father had been in a serious collision and was transported to a trauma unit. You see, my father and I have a rather strained yet non-existent relationship. He’s an alcoholic, recovering drug addict, suffers from severe PTSD as a product of trauma in childhood, and spent the majority of my childhood and even adulthood in and out of state jail, rehab, 12-Step Programs, and in and out of my life. The only thing that has been consistent with him, is his inconsistency. I have been the victim of and bore witness to a lot of things in my life as a direct result of him, and unfortunately as his only child and one of the few remaining relatives he has, the weight falls on my shoulders. I have cleaned up his messes more than once, and I swore I wouldn’t do it again, but this time is different, he is different. He just bought the truck involved in the collision, was living in it, got a good paying job, and was actually trying to get his life on track, and so I choose to move with grace and compassion. Sounds easy enough except the hospital wants to turn him out on the streets with severe injuries, and so I’ve spent my days going toe-to-toe with a money making machine, a broken system, and lack of resources. It’s still a work in progress, so I just have to stay focused, move mindfully, remove expectation, and trust the Divine. Truth be told, between the omens I have been getting, the May Key 5 Tarotcasts & the Gemini Season Tarotcasts, I knew something was coming. Check them out to see how this is all playing itself out in the real world; I'm a Libra Sun, Cancer Moon and Sagittarius Rising.
I am not sharing this for sympathy or a pat on the back, but rather so you know you’re not alone or singled out when it seems like the world is crumbling. That I, nor any other light worker, metaphysical practitioner, etc are better than or above you despite what social media may portray. Tower moments strike each of us a different times in our lives in different ways. We are each on our own journey, and are right where we need to be at the moment we need to be there even if we don't understand it at the time. I also want to point out that I don’t believe in coincidences, but even if I did, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that this is occurring at a time when I just rededicated myself to my intensive studies and personal development which includes extending compassion to those who I feel played a part in their present unfortunate circumstance.
How do we deal with these curveballs or potentially Tower moments?
First and foremost, if you find yourself faced with a curveball, a Tower even, try your best to respond rather than react (one of the best ways to do this is to ground). I like to think of these moments as the 5s in tarot that serve as a midway or tipping point between the beginning (1) and end (9). If you react, you may tip backwards and end up at square one, but if you respond, you can move forward towards resolution and a new beginning. As simple as it may sound, the best way to respond is to do the exact opposite of how you are naturally inclined to react. We see this in the 5s of tarot, the wisdom to overcome lies in doing the opposite of what you would normally do, the very things Pamela depicted.
Once you’ve focused on responding rather than reacting, see if you can figure out the “why” and the source. Trust your gut, feel your way, watch for guidance from Spirit, use your tools, and trust that the Divine is seeing things you aren’t or can’t. Know that on the other side of The Tower is The Star, a return of hope and faith.
Remember that when you’re batting curveballs, it’s ok to miss the first pitch or two, just make it a point not to strike out. Also, if you’ve been hit by the pitch with ill intent, get hyper-focused and line drive that bad boy right back at the pitcher’s 3rd eye. There's no room for darkness when you stand in the light
© Brandy Rachelle
Uncredited images from my personal collection or within the public domain